Christ in the Chaos

Welcome to Becoming the Oak, a space for women who want to experience peace and joy—not because life is easy, but because their hearts are rooted in Christ.

In this conversation, I sat down with my dear friend Jeanine, and together we explored what it really looks like to find Christ in the middle of chaos—not after the storm passes, but while you’re still living inside it.

Because sometimes the chaos isn’t temporary.
Sometimes it’s loss.
Sometimes it’s fear.
Sometimes it’s a lifelong calling you didn’t expect.

And yet—Christ is there in all of it.

In this episode:

• Navigating the loss of a child and finding sacred peace in grief

• Processing a Down syndrome diagnosis and the emotions that come with it

• Practical ways to stay rooted in Christ during long-term challenges

• Learning to find joy in small, everyday moments

• Recognizing Christ’s presence in both the chaos and the calm

Jeanine shared the story of her son Kaden, who was born with severe medical complications and lived just eight days.

They knew before he was born that his life might be short. They prepared their children. They taught them about eternal families. They spoke truth over and over again.

But in the quiet moments, Jeanine wrestled with her own heart:

Do I really believe what I’m teaching my children?

And the answer mattered—because she wanted to see her son again.

Even in the heartbreak, she described those days as sacred. There was a peace that didn’t make sense. A feeling of being carried.

That’s what it looks like when Christ meets you in the middle of grief—not removing it, but holding you through it.

After losing Kaden, Jeanine became pregnant again—and fear took over.

Every thought pointed to loss. Every moment felt uncertain.

But when her daughter was born healthy, something shifted:

“I didn’t realize what a miracle my other children were until I had lost one.”

Sometimes Christ doesn’t remove the fear immediately—but He slowly replaces it with perspective, gratitude, and healing.

Jeanine thought her family was complete.

Then came an unexpected pregnancy—her son Jensen.

What followed was not what she would have chosen: a premature birth, a Down syndrome diagnosis, a severe heart defect, and years of medical challenges.

In one of her most honest moments, she shared:

“I told Heavenly Father I didn’t want to do this. I didn’t want this life.”

That’s what real faith looks like sometimes.

Not polished. Not perfect. Just honest.

Because Christ doesn’t require perfection—He meets us in truth.

One of the most important truths from this conversation is this:

It’s okay that it’s not okay.

When life falls apart, when the diagnosis comes, when the future looks nothing like you planned—grief is part of the process.

Jeanine didn’t skip that part. She felt it fully.

And in doing so, she created space for Christ to enter into her pain, not just her strength.

When the trial doesn’t end—when it becomes part of your everyday life—faith becomes a daily choice.

Jeanine shared what that looks like in real life:

Creating Space for Stillness

“If I want to hear God, I need quiet.”

Even in a chaotic home, she intentionally finds moments to listen.

Letting Go of Control

She didn’t try to learn everything immediately. She chose to simply love her baby first.

Asking for Help

From support groups to medical guidance, she learned that asking for help isn’t weakness—it’s wisdom.

Trusting God-Given Capacity

She recognizes that her ability to handle stress is a gift—and part of God’s preparation for her life.

Joy doesn’t always look like big, life-changing moments.

Sometimes it looks like:

• A child making a sandwich for the first time

• A moment of self-control instead of frustration

• Siblings showing quiet love and connection

“You have to find joy in the tiny things.”

Because in chaotic seasons, the small moments are often the most sacred.

Jeanine has seen Christ show up in ways she didn’t expect:

• In callings she didn’t feel capable of accepting

• In impressions that led her to the right decisions

• In strength during moments that felt impossible

• In the quiet reassurance that her children are known and loved

One of the most tender things she shared was the connection she feels between her sons:

“I know their relationship is different than the rest of ours—and that brings me so much comfort.”

Even in uncertainty, Christ provides peace in deeply personal ways.

I shared my own experience of feeling like God answered prayers for everyone else—but not for me.

Even while doing all the “right” things, I struggled to feel His love.

It wasn’t until I chose to open my heart—intentionally—that things began to change.

Because choosing Christ isn’t about changing your circumstances.

It’s about letting Him change you within them.

He doesn’t always take away the chaos—but He will meet you in it.

If you’re in a season where joy feels far away, this is what Jeanine wants you to know:

• You are not forgotten

• You are not alone

• You are deeply known and loved

“It’s okay if you can’t do it. And it’s okay to ask for help.”

God knew your life would look like this—and He also knew He would be right beside you in it.

You don’t have to wait for life to calm down to feel peace.

You don’t have to have all the answers to feel anchored.

Christ is not waiting on the other side of your trial.

He is right in the middle of it.

Meeting you. Strengthening you. Walking with you.

So today, just take one step:

Be Still.
Believe.
And become.